Everything you didn't know about diet advice
I took the time recently to visit a lifestyle center in Double Bay, Sydney to discuss the concerns and myths around exercise and diet with one of the Worlds foremost experts on the subject, Professor Liam Daly well known bon viveur, gourmand and lifestyle guru.
The results will awaken new thoughts on diets. I'm astounded that we know so little. Thank God for the Irish.
The baldchemist. Are vegetables really good for my diet and how many should we eat on a daily basis?
Prof. Daly You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn- vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
The Baldchemist. Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
Prof. Daly. No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. So cheers and good health.
The baldchemist. How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
Prof Daly. Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.
The Baldchemist. What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
Prof Daly. Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!
The baldchemist. Aren't fried foods bad for you?
Prof. Daly. You're not listening.... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?
The Baldchemist. Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
Prof. Daly. Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
The Baldchemist. Is chocolate bad for me?
Prof. Daly. You are totally mad if you think so! Cocoa beans! Another vegetable. It's the best feel-good food around! Fill up reqularly.
The Baldchemist. Is swimming good for your figure?
Prof Daly. If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales,whalrus and seals to me.
The Baldchemist. Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
Prof Daly. What do you think round is? It’s a shape of course!
Hopefully this will clear up the misconceptions you may have had about food, diets and what is good and bad for you.
Prof Daly. Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Bollinger in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming, “ Jesus! What a f*#@*ing great ride".
Stumble It!
The results will awaken new thoughts on diets. I'm astounded that we know so little. Thank God for the Irish.
The baldchemist. Are vegetables really good for my diet and how many should we eat on a daily basis?
Prof. Daly You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn- vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
The Baldchemist. Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
Prof. Daly. No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. So cheers and good health.
The baldchemist. How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
Prof Daly. Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.
The Baldchemist. What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
Prof Daly. Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!
The baldchemist. Aren't fried foods bad for you?
Prof. Daly. You're not listening.... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?
The Baldchemist. Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
Prof. Daly. Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
The Baldchemist. Is chocolate bad for me?
Prof. Daly. You are totally mad if you think so! Cocoa beans! Another vegetable. It's the best feel-good food around! Fill up reqularly.
The Baldchemist. Is swimming good for your figure?
Prof Daly. If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales,whalrus and seals to me.
The Baldchemist. Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
Prof Daly. What do you think round is? It’s a shape of course!
Hopefully this will clear up the misconceptions you may have had about food, diets and what is good and bad for you.
Prof Daly. Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Bollinger in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming, “ Jesus! What a f*#@*ing great ride".
Labels: humour-fitness-health-diet- fatness-good fun
Stumble It!
posted by "The Baldchemist" at
4:11 am
3 Comments:
That Liam Daly fella is a genius
If there were more people like Liam Daly in the world what a wonderful healthy place it would be.
My kind of Professor,good on you !
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home